Back to My First Love

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From the Heart, On Love

Sunday morning in church, I noticed our pastor has started teaching from the book of Revelation. I was disappointed that I’ve already missed several weeks of teaching. The problem is, we’ve been missing so many Sundays. There’s always something that we allow to interfere with it. Work, projects, visiting family, going out of town, and worst of all, just sleeping in. All are excuses, and I just can’t beat around that bush. Now listen, I’m not talking about missing a couple of them, I’ve missed months of Sundays.

Luckily, Pacific Coast Church has a website where we can watch past sermons on video. After thinking about the sermon on Sunday I started planning to listen to the ones I’ve missed so I can get up to speed.

All weekend, I’ve been processing what’s different in my life. What was I doing when I felt like I was in a good place? I know in my gut, part of my recent feelings of displacement are because I’m not romancing with God. I thought about the times I spent loving Him and having that one-on-one time that just can’t be replaced by getting on the internet. I remembered how much I loved digging into the week’s scripture a little deeper. I thought to myself about how I’d love to get back to doing those things that kept me grounded and happy.

I planned that during the early mornings before I eat and work out, I’d just sit and listen to the sermons I’ve missed. After that, I’d be able to do the daily study regarding Sunday’s topic. I’d be returning to those habits that brought me happiness and peace in the past.

So, today was my first day, and we started with chapter two of Revelation, where Jesus is referring to the Church of Ephesus about returning to their first loves.


In my heart that’s what I’m doing. Mark, our pastor, made two points regarding how to not have a falling out with the Lord and returning to your first love. One, monitor your passion for Jesus. (Are you in love with Him, or the things about Him?) Two, reinstall past spiritual behaviors. (Do the things you were doing when you were “in love” with Him.)

What? …again

So let me get this right, I decided I wanted to focus on my relationship with God because I miss it. So, I remembered what I felt like when I practiced certain behaviors. I begin these behaviors and as I do, the teaching is about reinstalling spiritual behaviors to return to a place of romance with God?

He is a funny and personal god who meets us where we are every time. He never fails me, or grows distant from me. When I grow distant from him, all it takes is for me to turn around to see him and he’s so close I can usually trip over him. I’m feeling like I’m on the right track.


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Just a girl, on a journey. Thankful for love, thankful for friends and family, and thankful for forgiveness. Full of passion, conviction and hope.

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